I have to share, one of my guilty pleasures is reality television, Hear me out. I don't love all reality TV shows, there are plenty we can do without. But I do love the premise of what it could be. Essentially there is a reason why reality TV took off so quickly and has become so deep rooted in our community. People like people. Whether you are an extrovert and cant stand to be without people around you physically or an Introvert who spends a lot of time alone but will most likely be watching or reading something involving people. We fascinate each other and ourselves. Reality TV either connects with who you are, who you wish you could be or who you are glad your not.
I will also admit that I am a glass half full, rose colored glasses kind of girl so I can (usually) overlook a few of the negatives of a show and enjoy the good bits. Take the Kardashians for an example. I am not going to bother listing what is wrong with this show, I am sure you will already have a list of what you dislike however I love watching family interactions. I come from a small family which was fractured from divorce when I was in my late teens. Seeing a large family, who so effortlessly speak their truth with one another and have a visible love for one another is very enjoyable. I love the conversations this show has added to my little household. Yes we are worlds apart because of material possessions but the crux of the show, the issues they deal with in the episodes are fairly generic and are generally community issues. They encourage debate and exploration of you and your family or friends perspectives. Addiction, body image disorders, marriage breakdowns, sexuality, mental health, these are all prominent issues in today's society. And watching a family tackle these can be extremely helpful so those who are lost with what to do. And this is where my frustration with 'Married at First Sight' comes in. This show involves 4 couples who have never met get married and spend 4 weeks trying to make it work before they legally decide if the marriage is to go ahead or not. Don't roll your eyes, stay with me! The positives of this show is the people who are selected are 8 individuals who genuinely want to meet someone they can love and be happy with. They are invested in the relationship and are not trying to get their 15 minutes of fame. However there is usually a reason someone gets to a point where they are so frustrated by past relationships they choose the most exposing method of finding a mate. Over the 4 weeks you witness these couples fall in to bad habits and end up blaming their paired mate or the show for it not working. There are two psychologists who observe and talk to the viewers about what they are watching. There a millions of single people around the world who replicate these conflicts every day. This show should be a platform to help people work through their emotional niggles to help them see a better way to communicate and be at peace with them selves to achieve their ultimate goal. I would like to state there is absolutely nothing wrong with choosing to be single, but for those who are not happy, who want to have a partner but do not know how to overcome their obstacles, why not try help them? This is where networks and faceless men take away all that could be great with reality television and turn it into a blood bath. All four couples show promise of living happily ever after, if you could just step in, help them out, talk through their problems with them, help them become the people they so desperately want to be rather than pointing fingers for entertainment. The people at home watching could use relate to the problems the individual are facing and take on board the advice the psychologists are providing. Something amazing could come from a show like this, the world could be a little bit brighter, and then reality television wouldn't have to be a guilty vice, it could actually help people.
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Last week I received some terrible news. I have been striving towards a goal for a few years now, by September this year it should of been accomplished, However I made a made a few errors, took a short cut in the hope to get to what I so badly desire a little quicker and I am now paying the price. Although I acknowledge my mistake it is very disheartening and to begin with I did curl up and have a good cry and a bit of a pity party. The universe is a funny thing, it can trip you up, knock you off your feet, and then reach out and help you get back up. My job enables me to travel a little and this week I found myself heading out into the Gippsland region of Victoria. Gippsland is a beautiful area, predominantly dairy farmers, lots of rolling hills, with a stunning coastline. I was lucky enough to have some free time. Generally in these instances I would find a spot and work remotely but the sun was shining and the scenery was singing to me so I detoured and stopped in at a few look outs, said hello to a few of the four legged residents and just sucked up all the surroundings. It was a great time to stop and think, reflect. Sometimes just getting out of the everyday and connecting with whats around us can really help perspective. Yes I am still mad at myself but I am still on a path to achieving what I want, not all is lost, just delayed. Something great is still just around the corner and whats in front of me just this second is still pretty darn brilliant. "Don't surrender all your joy for an idea you used to have about yourself that isn't true anymore" - Cheryl Strayed
Its a wet Melbourne Tuesday. Yesterday was 26 degrees. The weather lady kindly told us we had just experienced our last day of Summer sun. We are now on board the Autumn train and wont be feeling the warmth of the suns rays until we get off around September. I have always loved the sun. Coming from a country that was literally named after the 'long white cloud' Its always been something of wonder to me. I moved to Queensland, Australia, 'the sunshine state' when I was 21 and set myself up in a beautiful coastal town. I would basque in the sunshine everyday, walking around shaking my head in disbelief that day after day the sun would rise and bring with it so much scrumptious heat. When I sit back and close my eyes I can teleport myself back to those days. They are so vivid in my mind. The power of the warmth when you walked out of your front door. Running down the road to grab a coffee, not a far distance only 100 meters, it would always trick me. By the time you get there you just buy a bottle of water, coffee seems ludicrous now your body is ramped to what feels like 50 degrees. I eventually left that little town for the city life of Melbourne. A broken heart and empty wallet can do that to you. So now I get my sunshine hit 3-4 months a year, another few months of teasing and a fair few months that remind me of home and are quite nostalgic in a way. I no longer hate the cold, I have found a sand bar to stand on, It doesn't swallow me in misery, I appreciate the seasons mother nature throws at us. There is something quite special about finding a quite corner in a cafe while everything is wet and hectic outside and you get to hide with a big mug of coffee and write your minds wanderings on a blog no one will read. “You can go your whole life collecting days, and none will outweigh the one you wish you had back.” ― Mitch Albom, For One More Day
Part of the fear of going on a spiritual journey and being true to yourself and living authentically, is to fear of people thinking she has truly lost it this time. I was thinking today about how we connect with our surroundings including the greater world, the universe. This brought me to the subject of psychics. If you relate to the word spiritual does that mean you believe in the afterlife? And if yes, that there is some level ground in which our souls can communicate? Are psychics just greatly misunderstood? I believe that the world and everything in it cannot just be one big mistake, coincidence or collision. I believe there is something bigger at work. That we co-created the worlds we live in. That vibration makes sense. I like the idea that we have some degree of control, responsibility to our future and that stuff isn’t just happening to us, the challenges of sad, fearful times are actually here to teach us something but the moment someone mentions talking to or connecting with the afterlife I tend to retreat. A don’t you go messing with my dead dad wall appears and I freeze. There is no greater wish for someone who has lost someone special, aside from them still being with us, is the idea of one more day. There is a local psychic who I am constantly learning from, inspired by her many lessons that she shares over podcast. I struggle to think she could possible deceive people. So I have moved from a straight out no to an I don’t know. Maybe one day I will be strong enough to approach the idea. But then follows the next step. If you had one more chance, one more conversation, what would you say? What would you ask? Are we supposed to know more or is the lesson, the greatest gift, in the finality of death? "I chase sunsets in hopes of meeting you at the horizon where heaven and earth collide" - Unknown
Yesterday would of been my Dad's 60th Birthday. I have been tense coming up to this date, unsure how my body will respond. Will it fall apart, shut down, convulse, or go numb at the unimaginable? He was suppose to make 60, he was suppose to make 80 too.... I feel like he was robbed, I was robbed. I feel frustrated and angry and an emotion unknown to me, I don't think there is a word for it. If I picture it, its a smokey blackness. Yesterday I decided to take the day off work and have a day where there was zero obligation. No smiling out of politeness or balancing of work/life. No anxiety over what needs to be done or running around cramming everything in to a ridiculous day. I wanted a day just to sit and be with his memory, try and feel his presence that I so dearly miss. Connect with him by connecting with the girl he created. We lived in separate countries, 10 years of distance. Whenever we spoke I would let him know he was missed. He would always say "Go live your life kid, cause no ones going to live it for you' So I have decided to spend his birthdays moving forward as a day for living. That could be a day at the beach soaking in the glorious warmth of the sun or doing something crazy and facing a fear but it will be 100% true to however I feel at that moment. Its a promise to be present, living in the moment for a whole day in memory to the person I knew who did that better than anyone else. So, life after death, what happens next? There is the concept of reincarnation, that we come back again for another round. That our soul never dies. I find a lot of comfort in this. They say your closest friends and family follow you through every cycle. That your best friend may be your husband next or was your mother, that souls know no age or gender. I think my Dad is up in heaven or wherever that may be, sitting down for a debrief with who ever co-creates this magnificent world we live in. He had learnt whatever great lesson he had seeked and will pick whatever he needs to work on next, and Ill be right by his side in one form or another. Always teaching each other to be our best selves. I love you Dad. "Intention is one of the most powerful forces there is. What you mean when you do a thing will always determine the outcome. The law creates the world." - Brenna Yovanoff
Someone once told me that Intention was like the opening arch of the spiritual journey. It is the glorious entrance into understanding a higher self. The idea behind setting your intention makes you focus right down into the centre of what it is you are hoping to achieve. Does your desire align with what you are striving for spiritually? Are you actions coming from a place of love or fear? What energy are you bringing into your world and those of your community? Every morning I wake up and set my intent. At first I found it difficult to understand the difference between a goal and intention. I feel that a goal is all about the ‘get’. I want to achieve a, b and c which will result in getting x. Intent is more about who you want to be for the sake of your soul rather than any material gains (although an authentic you will always be your best self so it could lead you to a more materialistically rich life). For an example a goal may be to score well on an upcoming exam. Where the intent for the day of the exam would be to; release a natural flow of knowledge from my mind to page. I particularly like to write down my intent and keep it with me when I know I have a difficult day ahead. When I have to meet with a client that I may find rude or off putting I would set my intent for the day to be about radiating love and kindness so when I walk into the room I have set the energy I want, to wrap them in kindness and take away some of their sharp edges. There have been times when I have been engaged in conversation with a friend or colleague and been disturbed to find that within myself the intent was coming from fear, that deep down you know if what you are doing, the intention behind it, is not from a good place. So give it a go, set your intent for the day , check in before you speak, before you gossip or put your 2 cents worth in, what is your intention, and does it feel good with your authentic self or is it your fear tricking you? Follow me on Instagram to check out a few of my daily Intentions! "Some people come into your life as blessings, Some people come into your life as lessons." - Mother Theresa.
Today was a great test for my new spiritual awareness. I was set with an emotional challenge. I felt deceived by a colleague at work and had to decide whether I would pull out from a commitment I had made with them or put my emotions aside and provide an unbiased well thought through calm and strategic contribution to the commitment. Normally in a situation like this I would talk to as many people as I could, gather everyone’s ‘advice’ when really I was seeking validation that my feelings of deception and frustrating were justified and how terrible this person has been to do such a thing to me, enter my latest victim story. Then I would enter the commitment with a frame of mind that I was going to prove how right I was and seek retribution to the deception. I would then walk away filled with fear that I had sabotaged my relationship with said colleague and be disgusted by my rampage. So when I got the word today of what had happened I had a small but controlled vent to my beloved who is the ying to my yang and so nonchalant to my little outbursts. I then thought about who would be best to give me a single piece of advice, and called a friend who naturally removes emotion from any business situation. I purposefully only gave him facts and detailed how I felt rather than focusing on the downfalls of my colleague. Throughout the day the upcoming event was on my mind, would I be able to rise above and be the emotionally mature person I wanted to be, to be open minded rather than determined to be right, physically I felt a little sick. Then I had a moment of clarity. The universe has presented me with a similar situation so many times in my life its hard to believe I have responded in the same way so many times, over and over again. Someone out there must be hitting their head against a wall, when will she get it! There has to be a lessons in this emotionally charged situation, what could it be, and what could the gift be? Tonight as I write I am proud of myself, I walked through the event with a smile on my face, a steady calm breath, an open mind and could feel my heart radiate. Regardless of the overall outcome, regardless whether there was deceit or not, those are someone else’s life lessons, mine was to learn to control my reaction, not the situation and open my mind to the concept that just because my opinion has been voiced does not mean it will be followed. "Quiet the mind and the soul will speak" - Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati
Meditation. It sounds like such an indulgent thing to do, a luxury of ones use of time, there is something quite worldly and wise about it. If you search for a book to help you learn about how to meditate, you have to go to the new age section. It does make me laugh; the earliest known written records of meditation are from India around 1500 BC, hardly what I would refer to as new. But in today’s society it either falls into two buckets. New Age – Which the Urban Dictionary refers to as 60’s hippies now adults without drugs or cause to support. Or Wellness – They biggest trend of the millennia. It is the era of proving to the world that you have ticked every box, your successful, rich, the perfect mother, crave nothing but green beans and chia seeds, hate the taste of anything that includes sugar and of course the ultimate. Being happy, you can have it all! If you google Wellness it brings up “trillion dollar industry” or “Wellness Tourism” not quite what I had in mind. However as you begin to read about meditation you begin to see that it has been an humble part of everyday life for a variety of indigenous cultures all over the globe. Meditation, to many cultures, is not hyped, new age or trendy it is as routine as brushing your teeth when you wake up in the morning. To get me started and make sure I’m not just lying down and taking a nap for 10 minutes a day I tried a variety of App’s (I will make sure to include Steve Jobs to my gratitude journal). I am currently using Headspace, DigiPill and Smiling Mind. Depending on how I am feeling I may pick Smiling Mind if I just need a bite-sized 2 minutes, or perhaps some hypnotic music to really clear our those thoughts from Digipill. For the majority so far Headspace has been the closest to what I think meditation for feel like for me. I do feel slightly more relaxed and had a very productive day yesterday working from home, something I do struggle to stay on track with. I am a habitual procrastinator, believing my greatest strengths always appear the minute before any deadline, one of the many things I would like to change about myself and hope to address as part of my quest for spiritual enlightenment. "And suddenly you know... It's time to start something new and trust the magic of new beginnings" - Meister Eckhart
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